50+ Funny Snakes Puns: Hiss-terical Jokes to Slither into Your Day


Got a fascination with our slippery serpentine friends? Or maybe you’re just looking for some light-hearted fun to share with friends and family? Look no further! We’ve compiled a collection of Funny Snakes Puns that are so good, they’ll rattle your funny bone. These puns are perfect for captions, one-liners, and jokes that will make you laugh out loud. Let’s dive in!

Interesting Fact: Did you know that snakes can “hear” through vibrations in the ground, sensing the world in a way most creatures can’t? Just like how humor sneaks up on you, these funny snake puns will slither right into your day, ready to rattle your funny bone!

Hiss-terical Funny Snakes Puns to Make You Laugh

funny snakes puns

Snakes Puns That Will Charm Your Socks Off

  1. Why don’t snakes drink coffee? Because it makes them viperactive.
  2. What do snakes use to clean their car windows? Windscreen vipers.
  3. What is a snake’s favorite TV show? Monty Python.
  4. What do you call a snake that builds things? A boa constructor.
  5. How do venomous snakes kill their prey? In cold blood.
  6. What do you get if you cross two snakes with a magic spell? Addercadabra and abradacobra.

Also Read: 100+ Zoo Puns: Unleash Your Laughter with Wildly Funny Animal Jokes

Slithering Snakes Jokes for Kids

snakes puns & jokes
  • 7. How does a snake shoot something? With a boa and arrow.
  • 8. What do you get if you cross a bag of snakes and a cupboard of food? Snakes and Larders.
  • 9. What do you call a snake that bakes? A pie-thon.
  • 10. What do you call a funny snake? Hissssssterical.
  • 11. What do married snakes have on their bath towels? “Hiss,” and “Herss.”
  • 12. Why are snakes so hard to fool? They have no legs to pull.

Funny Snake Birthday Puns

  1. Hope your birthday is hiss-terical!
  2. Don’t let this birthday slither by without a celebration!
  3. Wishing you a sssensational birthday full of surprises!
  4. You’re not getting older, you’re just shedding another year!
  5. Have a fang-tastic birthday, you sneaky charmer!
  6. Another year older, but you’re still one hisss-terious creature!
  7. Wishing you a ssspectacular birthday with no hisss-takes!
  8. Let’s rattle and roll – it’s your birthday, after all!
  9. Slither into your best birthday yet and have a snake-tacular time!
  10. Don’t be rattled by the years – just celebrate your snake-like charm!

These funny snake birthday puns add a playful twist to birthday wishes. Whether for a card, text, or social media post, they ensure your message slithers into someone’s heart with charm and wit!

Also Read: 100+ Safari Jokes: Roar with Laughter in the Wild

Snake Captions for Your Social Media Posts

snake captions for social media posts

Creative One-Liner Snakes Puns

  • 13. Why did the snake cross the road? To get to the other ssssssssside.
  • 14. Who is a snake’s favorite author? William Snakespeare.
  • 15. Why do snakes always measure in inches? Because they don’t have feet.
  • 16. What did the snake give her boyfriend? A goodnight hiss.
  • 17. What did the snake say to the loud children at the library? “Ssssss.”
  • 18. What do you call a snake that’s 3.14 meters long? A “Pi”-thon.

ALSO READ: 180+ Hilarious Capybara Puns & Jokes to Brighten Your Day

Short and Sweet Snakes Puns

short and sweet snake puns
  • 19. can’t a snake rob a bank? Because they are unarmed.
  • 20. What do you call an important English snake? Sir Pent.
  • 21. What’s a snake’s favorite dance? The mamba.
  • 22. What kind of letters did the snake get from his admirers? Fang letters.
  • 23. Why should you never weigh a snake? They have their own scales.
  • 24. What do you call a snake that’s shed its skin? Snaked.

One-Liner Snakes Puns for Captions

  1. “Don’t be such a snake charmer!”
  2. “I’m just ssssuper excited!”
  3. “Keep calm and sssslither on.”
  4. “Feeling fang-tastic today!”
  5. “Ssssorry, I’m hissing this one out.”
  6. “Boa-n appetite!”
  7. “Life’s a hiss and then you shed.”
  8. “You’re viper-active today!”
  9. “Don’t scale back your dreams.”
  10. “Time to rattle and roll!”

Snake Puns for Social Media Captions

  1. Sss-unday Funday! 🐍☀️
  2. Feeling sssuper today! 🐍💪
  3. Just ssslaying it! 🐍👑
  4. Can’t resist this sssmile! 🐍😁
  5. Fang you very much for all the love! 🐍💖
  6. Sssilently plotting my next move… 🐍🤫
  7. Living the sssmooth life! 🐍✨
  8. Feeling hiss-terical today! 🐍😂
  9. Ssslithering into the weekend like… 🐍🎉
  10. Time to hiss and tell! 🐍💬

These snake-themed social media captions with emojis add a playful and expressive twist to your posts! Perfect for sharing some hiss-terical vibes while engaging your followers with humor and creativity.

Hiss-terical Snake Stories and Jokes

funny jokes

Longer Snake Jokes to Share with Friends

25. A Boy Scout asks his scout leader, “Sir, is this snake poisonous?” The scout leader looks at it and says, “No, that snake’s not poisonous at all.” So the boy picks up the snake, which bites him. The boy starts to spasm and foam at the mouth as the other kids look on in horror. The scout leader says, “But that snake is venomous. Poison is ingested or absorbed, while venom is injected. Let’s get it right next time, boys.”

26. After the flood, satisfied his work was done, Noah was inspecting the ark one last time when he came across a pair of snakes. “Why are you still here?” he asked in surprise. “It’s safe now. Go forth! And multiply!” The snakes stared at him in confusion. “But… we’re adders.”

27. A jellyfish, a snake, and a snail walk into a bar. The jellyfish says, “This is impossible.”

Snake Jokes for Adults

28. My girlfriend is a snake. Whenever you ask her whose fault was it, she goes “HISSSSSSSSSS.”

29. Doctor: “Can you describe the snake that bit you?” Patient: “Yes. It looked like an angry rope.”

30. I got mugged by a cobra once when I was walking through the park. I wouldn’t recognize it again, though. It was wearing a hood.

See Also: The Oceans of Laughter: Diving Deep into the World of Shark Puns

Funny Snake Names

  1. Hiss-ter
  2. Fangdango
  3. Slithery Swift
  4. Cobra Kai
  5. Slinky McSssnakeson
  6. Monty Python
  7. Sir Slithers-a-Lot
  8. Boa Constrictor-ious
  9. Snape the Snake
  10. Julius Squeezer
  11. Slitherine
  12. Sssophie Sssnake
  13. Sneaky Pete
  14. Scaley Potter
  15. Hiss Hannibal

These funny snake names offer a unique way to add some humor and personality to your reptilian friends! Whether you’re naming a pet snake or just need a giggle, these names bring clever wordplay to the table.

Clever Snakes Puns for Every Occasion

clever funny puns

Perfect Snakes Puns for Captions and Social Media

  • 31. Why did Woody have to wear sneakers? There was a snake in his boot.
  • 32. What kind of car does a snake drive? An ana-honda.
  • 33. What’s a snake’s favorite dance? The snake, rattle, and roll.
  • 34. What do snakes do when they get angry? They throw hissy fits.
  • 35. What is a snake’s favorite school subject? Hisstory.
  • 36. Nobody wants to listen to White Snake with me. So here I go again on my own.

Snake Puns for All Ages

snake puns for all ages
  1. Why don’t snakes drink coffee? — Because it makes them hyperactive.
  2. What do snakes use to clean their car windows? — Windscreen vipers.
  3. What is a snake’s favorite TV show? — Monty Python.
  4. What do you call a snake that builds things? — A boa constructor.
  5. How do venomous snakes kill their prey? — In cold blood.
  6. What do you get if you cross two snakes with a magic spell? — Addercadabra and abradacobra.
  7. How does a snake shoot something? — With a boa and arrow.
  8. What do you get if you cross a bag of snakes and a food cupboard? — Snakes and larders.
  9. What do you call a snake that bakes? — A pie-thon.
  10. What do married snakes have on their bath towels? — “Hiss,” and “Herss.”
  11. Why are snakes so hard to fool? — They have no legs to pull.
  12. Why was the snake mad at the jewel thief? — Because he wanted his diamondback.
  13. Which snake is a member of a rock band? — A rattlesnake.
  14. What do you give a sick snake? — Asp-rin.
  15. How can you rescue a snake that looks dead? — With mouse-to-mouth resuscitation.
snake jokes

Wrap-Up


Whether you’re a fan of pythons or boas or just love a good pun, these snake jokes will surely bring a smile to your face. Use them to entertain your friends, share these animal puns on social media, or enjoy a good laugh. Remember, laughter is the best medicine, even if it comes from the hiss-terical world of snakes!

David S. Colunga

Leave a Comment